1 hour ago
75,210 notes

pearls:

pearls:

i touched a dick once and it was the scariest thing in my life because it had a really cold head and i don’t know it wasn’t fun

sometimes the ‘i’ and ‘u’ shouldn’t be so close on the keyboard 

1 hour ago
2,489 notes

maniacalnumerals:

sheepard-commander:

what even is dangnabbit ropan about

I think it’s about some kids who go to build-a-bear in Hell idk

1 hour ago
6,266 notes

ballerdollar:

lessons learned from anime

• don’t get inside the robot
• people with bad haircuts always lose
• the cute girl is psycho
• the cute guy isn’t human
• when in doubt scream “baka” and run away
• glasses should be adjusted with one finger in a condescending manner
• gotta catch em all
• and maybe probably respect your elders

1 hour ago
42,114 notes

yourendorphine:

homophobic participating countries who didn’t show the gay kiss on eurovision must pay a fine because eurovision must be shown from beginning to end without cutting anything out and they are banned from eurovision for the next three years

i am crying right now i love you europe

1 hour ago
34,768 notes

clumsyoctopus:

flower language has always been an intense source of disappointment for me

like, they all mean really generic things like “love” or “forever” or “i’m sorry” 

i thought you could combine flowers

like you could just send someone a bouquet and from the combination of hibiscus and posies and tulips they’d understand “the rebel leader is dead, rendezvous at the docks at 8, bring the dog, you will need lighter fluid and  a large tomato”

1 hour ago
70,050 notes

whiskey-memories:

bras are so expensive like i didn’t choose the boob life the boob life chose me